How sobriety helped me embrace uncertainty — As Medium is want to do, it thrust on me a gorgeous little article on the more subtle changes that accompanied a mom/therapist/painter/writer’s sobriety. She articulated right there in the subtitle something that I’ve found myself appreciating more and more since I stopped drinking. “…but inside, I’m evolving in ways I never expected.” Drinking, the version of me who…

From anxious-avoidant to secure — I was recently introduced to a theory of human connection called Attachment Theory through Amir Levine & Rachel Heller’s book Attached. Attachment Theory posits that there are 3 main categories of how we intimately relate to each other — secure, avoidant and anxious. Being human requires connection and intimacy, but…

When it’s good, it’s GOOD — Rejection is not an easy experience. But if we’re doing life right, it is necessary to learn to deliver and receive it. It can be liberating… beautiful, even. Rejection is part of the curating process that allows us to move through life with purpose and confidence. …

Living for the future, wasting today — The pandemic is bringing up a great many flaws in the American experiment, like bodies rising to the surface after a deluge. Our disagreements about the merits of individualism leading to a controversial mask debate… our inadequate safety net leaving families without security… our stunted conversations about race and class…

A newfound respect for home base — There are a thousand insights from this prolonged period of being home-bound. Many of them are related to the concept of home itself — a place usually so familiar its practically ignored — becoming new again as it takes on so many functions over the course of this Shelter-in-Place stretch. …

They’re just like us — Okay, that’s not entirely true. Teens are a dodgy mixture of immature senses of humor, spongy brains, and twitchy energy in full-grown bodies. I read recently that the part of our brains that understands long-term thinking is still developing in our teens. So they have the strength of adults with…

Spoiler: they are not the same — The people who inhabit our lives are vital. They play an integral role in our quality of life, our behaviors and what we manage to accomplish. It’s important to invest in healthy relationships. …

Squad goals, 20 years later — I was a cheerleader in high school, a phase of my life that feels so distant, I seldom think about it. Its (ostensibly) far removed from my current identity as a fiercely independent professional, self-defense instructor, intersectional feminist writer with a sailor-like vocabulary and a solitary disposition. …

When the end takes its time — The finale of 2019 didn’t leave me with a satisfying sense of closure the way past years have. I’m usually rarin’ to review the 12 months prior and set some goals and intentions for the next 12 in the week between Christmas and New Year’s Day. …